How to Insult Someone in Martial Arts

I admit it—I talk trash. Lots of it. To me, trash talk is just another weapon to break down my opponent’s focus and confidence. But if you really want to know how to insult someone in the martial arts, let me share a little secret…

Pay them a compliment.

Here’s how it works…

My brother is a solid guy. He’s weighed between 225 and 290 pounds most of his life. But he’s also been training as a martial artist for most of his life.

If you ever get the chance to work out with him, here’s a guaranteed way to tick him off…

After he grabs you, slams you on the ground, pins you, and submits you, give him a big smile and say, “Man, you’re strong!”

His face will drop. He’ll frown and say—

“Strong? You think I beat you because I’m strong? No— I beat you because I know what I’m doing!”

Here’s another example. The other day I was training with a young sparring partner. After the first round, he paid me a compliment: “You’re really fast.”

My face dropped. That’s in the blood, I guess. I snapped back—

“Fast? I’m friggin’ 44 years old! You’re 25. I’m not fast. Call me efficient, decisive, maybe even clever, but don’t tell me I’m fast!”

See how this works? Now you know how to insult someone in the martial arts.

Insult Secret #1:
Look past the skills they have achieved through hard work and only give them credit for the qualities they were blessed with at birth.

You can hear these types of insults everywhere. Like when–

• Sports commentators refer to a star player as “a natural” instead of remarking on all of their hours of dedicated practice.
• Parents praise a child for getting an A at school by saying, “You’re so smart!” instead of praising the extra effort that went into studying.
• Employers celebrate a successful project by commenting, “That was a great idea!” instead of celebrating the process of trial and error that led up to the big success.
• Professionals of every sort who introduce their female colleagues as “lovely” or “beautiful” instead of calling attention to their experience or background.

There’s a lesson here—

Not all compliments are created equal.

Don’t waste your kind words shining a spotlight on something that doesn’t deserve attention. Giving someone credit for something they didn’t work for is empty praise. When you give empty praise, you not only insult the other person, you reveal how little you know! Here’s why—

Beginners don’t always know what experience looks like. Amateurs don’t always know how many skills they lack. Beginners only notice the qualities they can understand, like speed, strength, good looks, or smarts.

But a person with experience and skill is able to recognize the experience and skill of others. If you spar with a master, they will say things like, “Your timing on the counter-punch was perfect,” or “That was a great set-up.” A master would never say, “Man, you’re fast!”

Beginners see what happened. Masters see how it happened.

Consider a magic show. I know very little about magic, so if I see a tiger disappear or someone levitate over the audience, I say, “Wow! That’s amazing!”

Now imagine David Copperfield sitting in the same crowd. Do you think he’d ever say, “Wow! That’s amazing!” He might, actually, but not because he’s never seen a tiger disappear. David Copperfield would only say “wow” if he was impressed by how well the trick was being performed. After all—

• Who can appreciate the performance of a magician better than another magician?
• Who can appreciate the food of a world class chef better than another world class chef?
• Who can appreciate the movements and techniques of a master martial artist better than another master martial artist?

But wait! A guide in how to insult someone in the martial arts wouldn’t be complete without this classic tactic—

Insult Secret #2:
Instead of complimenting your partner’s victories, makes excuses for your defeats.

Here’s how this one works…

You spar with a guy. He shuts you down. Nothing you do works.

When the match is over, you shake hands and tell him, “Ouch. Today was leg day at the gym. I could barely move out there.”

Or how about, “Man, I’m on no carbs this week. I got zero energy.”

POW! SMACK! Two perfect insults.

Those are real-life examples, by the way. I heard both of them from sparring partners who didn’t realize how insulting excuses can be.

Think about it— what they were saying essentially was, “Yeah, you beat me, but only because I’m not at my best today.”

Oh, really? Well, then let me ask you this, hot shot—

Who says I’m at my best today? Maybe I lifted weights, too. Maybe I cut carbs this week. Maybe I have a sprained ankle or was up all night with food poisoning.

You don’t know! And you’ll never know because it doesn’t matter.

If you win, you win. If you lose, you lose. Deal with it.

So, the next time you’re working out with someone better than you, or who gets the better of you, don’t insult them. Don’t make excuses and don’t make the mistake of saying something nice… not until you take a closer look at what they’re doing.

If you look hard enough, you might just see something you missed the first time. Something you can learn. Something you can do, too, if you practice hard enough.

And don’t worry— if you take a closer look and still can’t figure out how someone is beating you, remember this formula…

First, say, “Wow.” That’s always a nice icebreaker.

Then ask one simple question: “How did you do that?”

That, my friend, is a real compliment.