Don’t Talk to Tigers: The Worst Mistake in Martial Arts

Imagine you’re at the zoo. AGHHH! You hear a scream. You spin around and see the door to the tiger cage thrown open…

A tiger is sitting on your friend’s chest, biting his head off. You’re horrified because your friend not only owed you money, but was also your ride home.

Uh oh. The tiger spots you and leaps in your direction…

You run. The tiger pounces…

You feel the tiger’s claws slice into your back as it slams you to the ground. You feel the tiger’s teeth cut into–

Wait! Stop right there.

At this exact moment, with the tiger’s weight crushing you and the smell of your friend on his hot breath, are you even thinking about talking to the tiger?

Would you spend one second trying to convince the tiger to not kill you? Would you try to make friends with the tiger? Would you try to distract him by asking what sports he likes or if he’s seen the latest Iron Man movie?

Of course not! He’s a tiger! All you can do is fight back as hard as you can and hopefully injure it or scare it away.

Well, guess what? The same is true when defending against human beings.

If you’re attacked, the time for talk is over. You need to fight, fight, fight.

Yes, de-escalation works. I have talked my way out of many bad situations with clever wordplay like, “You’re right. I am an idiot.” Talking is also a great way to confuse an attacker by shouting out odd thoughts like, “Do you smell fried chicken?” In short–

Words work!

But words work best before an attack, not during. We must never confuse the time for talking and the time for taking action. Whether that action is running to your car, pulling a fire alarm, or punching someone square in the face, know this–

When the time for talking is over, any action is better than no action.

Which brings me to the topic of martial arts schools. The worst mistake I see in martial arts schools is allowing small talk during practice time. Seriously–mixing conversation and fighting techniques is both dumb and dangerous.

Has this ever happened to you?

You’re about to spar or drill and your partner says, “Dude–did you see that Anderson Silva leg break?”

You want to be friendly, so you smirk, “Yeah, that was crazy.”

Congratulations! You’ve just become the two worst students in class. You might as well take off your uniforms and walk to the café down the street for a couple of lattes.

For more on being a good student, check out 5 Tips for New Martial Arts Students.

Think about it–at the moment when you should be at your most focused, most decisive, and most aware, you’re filling your head with nonsense. You’re confusing the time for talk and the time for taking action. Which is dangerous.

How can you trust your partners to strike, lock, and choke you with control when they can’t even control their minds long enough to stop talking?

How can you trust yourself to learn, improve, and build solid self-defense habits when you allow your mind to be pulled off-task so easily?

I’m not saying socializing has no place in a martial arts school. Of course it does! Small talk builds trust and breeds good spirit. But off-task chatter should be limited to before and after class. During class, we should stick to asking questions about the lesson, asking for feedback on our technique, or giving feedback about our partner’s technique.

That’s it. And even then, conversation should be short and sweet. Here’s why–

Class time is action time. Unless you’re specifically role-playing self-defense scenarios or practicing de-escalation techniques, you don’t need to practice talking. You talk all day long. You’re a 10th degree grandmaster of talking.

But what if there’s a tiger on your back? What if there’s a punk pumping a knife into your stomach? What if there are two mother$#%!ers hurting someone you love?

When it’s time to act, act. Period. You must not allow anything to shatter your focus or ruin your flow. Your life–and the lives of the people you love–depend on your committed, concentrated effort.

But committed, concentrated effort takes practice. You must train yourself to flip the switch between being civil and being brutal…between thinking with your head and thinking with your body. Flipping that switch is the most important exercise a good martial arts class can offer.

The problem is flipping that switch makes people uncomfortable. They don’t want to be brutal. They don’t want to imagine being killed. Or killing.

Which is why they like to talk. It makes them feel safe!

But confronting the issues of life and death is the essence of martial arts. Confronting life and death is how you discover the most profound insights about yourself and others. If you practice martial arts with the same mindset as playing checkers, you’re not only sabotaging your ability to defend yourself, you’re sabotaging your ability to know yourself.

So, if you want to help your partner, skip the small talk and work your techniques. If you want to help yourself, when your partner starts to talk about movies, tell him, “Man, I really need to work on this. Can you help me?” By asking for help, you’ll make your partner feel so valued and respected they won’t want to talk about movies.

No matter what, when you’re on the mats, always imagine you’re being attacked by a tiger. Imagine that the time for talking has passed. Flip the switch and practice what you can’t practice anywhere else.

You can sit down with a couple of lattes after class.

Do you agree? Leave a comment!